How to find a therapist near me that’s a good fit
Finding a therapist can be a daunting process. Maybe you are wary about therapy in general, or maybe you’re uneasy about how to know who you can trust with your story. Therapy can be a hugely valuable experience, but the process of getting into therapy can sometimes feel so overwhelming that you end up putting it off, deprioritizing your well-being in the process. Or maybe you start doing the research but find yourself unsure how to sort through the seemingly endless listings of therapists near you in online directories. I hope that this blog simplifies your search and helps you find a therapist who meets your particular needs.
Identify Your Preferences
Before jumping on the internet to begin your search, take a few minutes to check in with yourself. Consider any preferences that you have about the therapist you work with. If you have a strong inclination about who your therapist is in terms of their identity, take note of that. For example, some people prefer to work with therapists with a particular gender identity, racial identity, religious affiliation, or sexual orientation. Or at the very least, you may wish to confirm that your therapist has experience working with people with those identities.
Next, think about the therapy format that makes the most sense for you–meeting in person or virtually (or a bit of both). Depending on how flexible your schedule is, you may also want to note specific times when you would be available to meet for therapy so that you can be sure that potential therapists have availability that would accommodate your schedule.
Another important logistical factor to bear in mind is your budget for therapy. While not all therapists accept insurance, if your insurance offers out-of-network reimbursement for mental health services, even private pay therapy should qualify. If you have an HSA or FSA, you should also be able to cover therapy using those accounts.
You’ll also want to make note of any particular specialities or modalities that you would like your therapist to use. This may look like finding therapists who specialize in working with clients with challenges similar to your own (anxiety, trauma, relationship distress, etc.). Consider any therapeutic approaches that you experienced in the past with previous therapists and whether you would like your new therapist to utilize similar or different modalities. Maybe you haven’t been in therapy before, but you have heard of certain types of therapy from friends or online and think they might be a good fit for you.
Finally, check in with yourself and identify whether there are any personality preferences that you have in a therapist. Do you want a therapist who defers to you when it comes to the flow of sessions or one who is more actively engaged? Do you prefer therapists who are more or less structured in how they approach therapy? Noting these preferences gives you really valuable information about yourself. Get curious about why you have these inclinations so that you can balance preferences that will increase your sense of trust with your therapist while still challenging yourself to step outside of your comfort zone. We tend to experience the most growth in therapy when we are willing to stretch ourselves beyond our comfort zones while simultaneously feeling safety within our relationship with our therapist.
Evaluate Your Options
Now that you have a good idea of what you are looking for, you’re ready to start evaluating your options. There are several avenues you can use to find therapists who may be a good fit for you. Referrals are common among therapists, so using your existing network to find a nearby therapist who is a good fit can be a great place to begin. Consider any friends or family members who live nearby who you know are in therapy. If you’re comfortable, you could ask them how they feel about their therapist. If your life isn’t closely intertwined with this friend or family member, it’s possible you would be able to work with their therapist if that’s something you would feel open to. If they are a close family member or a friend who you would likely discuss in therapy, then it probably doesn’t make sense for you to work directly with their therapist. That said, you could ask your friend or family member to ask their therapist to pass along referrals for you. Therapists are often connected with local therapist networks and can ask their contacts if they have availability. These personal recommendations can be an amazing way to streamline and personalize your search.
That said, therapy is a private experience, so if you’re not comfortable asking friends or family to help you identify potential therapists, that’s completely understandable. You can also use Google or ChatGPT to kick off your search. (Please note: Google and ChatGPT are not substitutes for professional mental health care, diagnosis, or therapy.) If you’re looking for an in person therapist, searching for therapists or counselors near you can be helpful. You may encounter group practices, like Midtown Psychotherapy Associates (MPA), in this search. MPA in particular has a team of about 40 therapists and offers an initial intake assessment service to help match you with a therapist at the practice with current availability who would be a good fit for your needs. You can read more about MPA’s matching and intake services here.
Other online search options might include directory websites like PsychologyToday where you can filter by many of the preferences outlined above as well as factors like location, current availability, and whether clinicians are private pay or are paneled with insurance companies. This is a particularly useful tool if you need to use insurance to cover your therapy expenses. Feel Out Fit
Once you’ve identified at least one therapist who you think seems like a good fit for you, you’ll want to reach out to them either via email, over the phone, or by filling out a contact form on their website or via a directory like PsychologyToday. Therapists who are actively taking clients should get back to you within a couple of business days. Most therapists offer free 15-minute consultation calls where you get to know the therapist a bit and feel out whether you still think they could be a good fit for you. To best assess compatibility, during these calls you’ll want to prioritize making sure that the clinician has a brief overview of what you are looking to work on in therapy so that they can confirm whether the type of work you are looking to do is within their scope of practice. If you have any particular preferences in terms of personality or approach, the consultation would be a good time to communicate those as well so that your therapist can let you know if those preferences align with who they are and how they work. Before wrapping up the consultation, check in with yourself to see how you feel about moving forward and scheduling an initial session with this therapist. Try to trust your gut, and take the leap if it feels right!
Deciding to move forward and start working with a therapist is a huge accomplishment in and of itself. You trusted yourself to know that you wanted to invest in your relationship with yourself (and your relationship with your partner if you’re looking to begin couples therapy). Keep trusting yourself as the therapy process unfolds. If you are starting to feel as though your expectations aren’t aligning with the reality of the therapy experience, I encourage you to bring these thoughts and feelings into therapy and talk to your therapist about them. Most therapists are open to feedback. As therapists, it’s our ethical obligation to make sure that you are getting the care that you need, whether it’s from us or from someone else who could be a better fit.
I hope these tips help reduce some of the barriers to entry by making finding the right therapist feel more accessible and a little less intimidating. Though the process can be challenging, know that by taking on the task of searching for a therapist, you are already one step closer to achieving your goals. I wish you the very best on the journey ahead. You’ve got this!
